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Missing Adult

by Fine Grain

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1.
Calculate 03:12
Calculate this state of mind Turn on the VCR And then press rewind Descending numbers represent time Give a sense of purpose But it's just a lie Weathered shingles Awkward mingle Boring conversations with lonely singles Drinks are empty Like their eyes Fade away Fantasize Took the bait Couldn't wait Fell in love on the very first date Couldn't live Wouldn't die Focus with your one good eye New rendition New design Out of touch out of time Here I am There you are Passenger in my own car Calculate Calculate Calculate this state of mind Calculate Calculate Calculate remaining time Waking up Cold react Wasted hours spent on your back Your arm beneath Her heavy skull All the while increase your toll So what is knowing What is truth Breakfast in the corner booth Your gray hairs dangled Over glasses You could hush the huddled masses Couldn't live Wouldn't die Focus with your one good eye A new rendition New design Out of touch and out line So calculate The remaining time Pour out the gin Squeeze the lime Glasses Empty Like our eyes Fade away Fantasize Calculate Calculate Calculate this state of mind Calculate Calculate Calculate remaining time Calculate Calculate Focus with your one good eye Calculate Calculate Calculate Calculate
2.
Look at Us 01:50
I can see it You're just misunderstood I can see it Yeah there's nothing in you that was ever good I can see it I can see it Don't wanna be it A toy you use and put back down Don't wanna be it Take the hits don't make a sound You don't need it The illusion of a friend You don't need it There's nothing now that you can mend Don't wanna be it You don't need it Whatcha know about life How bout ya tell me how it could be I can see it in your eyes That you know nothing more than me But that's the thing about pride It's much easier to see Than ever realize You know nothing more than me I can see it Don't wanna be it I can see it Don't wanna be it There's no reason To treat people this way There's no reason No wonder no one ever stays Call it treason You do it to your self Call it treason It's time to put you on the shelf There's no reason Call it treason Whatcha know about life How bout ya tell me how it could be I can see it in your eyes That you know nothing more than me But that's the thing about pride It's much easier to see Than ever realize You know nothing more than me Tell me something I believe Show me something I can see Tell me something I believe Show me something I can see Show me something Show me something Oof
3.
In a deep dark tunnel In a foreign land I can't escape it They come and find you man It's not a problem of haste There's no lack of determination They always seem to find me Try and sell you their plan We've been trying to reach you About your car's extended warranty We've been trying to reach you About your car's extended warranty Remove yourself from the lists Change the digits they need to call Explore their methods to track you Ensure each ends with a wall And when you're finally finished You feel the joy that it brings You sit down to a beer and a line Until your phone starts to ring We've been trying to reach you About your car's extended warranty We've been trying to reach you About your car's extended warranty We've been trying to reach you About your car's extended warranty We've been trying to reach you About your car's extended warranty
4.
Juice 02:48
So there I was another acid trip A trip straight from hell Hope I'd see the end of it But I thought I'd at least get out there and try And then I met a big great man And the clan inside his van And I learned a lot about their culture Acidic juice at a rest stop Hasidic Jews at a rest stop Acidic juice at a rest stop Hasidic Jews at a rest stop Acidic juice at a rest stop Hasidic Jews at a rest stop Acidic juice at a rest stop Hasidic Jews at a rest stop So that's it that's how the story goes I made a real good friend We catch a lot of shows And he invited me over with the fam for Hanukkah But I woke up boy, yeah I came to I never met no Hasidic Jew I freaked out, got naked, and got tased by the cops Acidic juice at a rest stop Hasidic Jews at a rest stop Acidic juice at a rest stop Hasidic Jews at a rest stop Acidic juice at a rest stop Hasidic Jews at a rest stop Acidic juice at a rest stop Hasidic Jews at a rest stop
5.
i. 01:19
6.
Wow A silence in reflection A coldness to the eyes A style of violent perfection A viper in disguise And rot, with the fish out in the bay And talk, use the words that I won't say I'm just trying my best to get away Just stop Just stop If you say you are my friend I don't wanna be a missing adult You should know this is the end I don't wanna be a missing adult And if you save your breath I don't wanna be a missing adult In this place until your death I don't wanna be a missing adult Leave me alone Wow A silence in reflection The voice inside of your head An unconscious intention Blood you've already bled And rot, with the fish out in the bay Jigsaw, it just won't fit that way I can't find the words I want to say Just stop Just stop If you say you are my friend I don't wanna be a missing adult You should know this is the end I don't wanna be a missing adult And if you save your breath I don't wanna be a missing adult In this place until your death I don't wanna be a missing adult Leave me alone I've given you a chance to walk away I got my reasons not to stay Not here to say that it's your fault I'm not alright I'm a missing adult I've given you a chance to walk away I got my reasons not to stay Not here to say that it's your fault I'm not alright I'm a missing adult
7.
KrudKutter 01:23
Krudkutter Everybody's got their mess to clean Everybody's got a place to be Seeing people that they haven't seen Being places they have never been Krudkutter Cleans your mess Dust and grime it'll make it sheen Just makes it better i'm not being mean Cuttin' krud just feels so right Cut the krud right outta your life Krudkutter It's the best Clean up quick when you've gotta host Clean that mess you've been dreading most Dirt and mold don't stand a chance Krudkutter and I share a sweet romance Krudkutter Put it to the test Whether on the roof or on the wall A piece of dookie in the bathroom stall Matt's vomit on the futon couch Staying clean in the Fine Grain house Krudkutter
8.
I am not your puppet but here I swing The noose around my neck is tightening I'm not the subject of your abuse Just let me go, please cut me loose Just let me go, please cut me loose Just let me go, please cut me loose And it's not my occupation to keep you amused One day you are gonna have to choose Keep my on the line or let me off the hook Just make sure you do it by the book I'm a loser I'm a freak I think it's best if you euthanize me Just make sure you do it by the book I lost my mind I don't know where to look Just make sure you do it by the book And I don't even blame you it's not your fault I must have missed the writing on the wall I can stop by later and grab my things Until then I'll just be dangling I'm a loser I'm a freak It may be best just to euthanize me I might be acting irrationally I am not your puppet but here I swing The noose around my neck is tightening I'm not the subject of your abuse Just let me go, please cut me loose Just let me go, please cut me loose
9.
Pushin' Away 01:46
I keep moving I can never stand still Shoes are proving A better cure than a pill I've been losing And losing And losing my brain Leaves me nothin' Nothin' drives me insane You keep pushin' And pushin' And pushin' away Body moves but my head stays exactly the same You keep pushin' And pushin' And pushin' away Body moves but my head stays exactly the same Can't stop walking My feet are outta control It's a disorder And it's taking its toll I keep moving And moving And moving myself And ignoring Signs of diminishing health You keep pushin' And pushin' And pushin' away Body moves but my head stays exactly the same You keep pushin' And pushin' And pushin' away Body moves but my head stays exactly the same
10.
CBR 02:56
Lost in a moment of self doubt A wave of emotion returns me to reality A toxic thought passes through my brain I sail my own ship can't sink again Can you tell me what's happening to me I can't feel my face it's getting hard to see My self-medication has failed me again I find it hard to justify the person I've been Toss and turn until the dawn Can't hold any food down long I move along to pass the time Out of sight Out of mind Carve out a moment in time to reflect Explore your own mind out of context Remember what it was like to think on your own A trait some other people never know In the end, there's only how you feel about yourself Have you created a heaven or a personal hell? In the absence of darkness light prevails The absence of success yields endless fails Can you tell me what's happening to me I can't feel my face it's getting hard to see My self-medication has failed me again I find it hard to justify the person I've been Toss and turn until the dawn Can't hold any food down long I move along to pass the time Out of sight Out of mind
11.
ii. 00:41
12.
Cigs 02:34
The winners circle's always littered with the bodies of those that lost You can't determine what you've won until you've found out what it cost Profits down and costs go up Your money's gone without a trace Fear and anguish chase the look of joy further from your face Have you seen my cigarettes? I can't seem to find them Always filled with deep regret I close my eyes to hide it And still I can't forget The loophole in blindness Is that you're still alive To take their fucking shit You've gotta run kid Taking all you've got was a part of their plan You're just a pawn You're just a hack You're just a low class kind of man There's no rest for the wicked ones The choice would never be yours to choose That's how it goes for the people like us Even when you win, you still lose Have you seen my cigarettes? I can't seem to find them Always filled with deep regret I close my eyes to hide it And still I can't forget The loophole in blindness Is that you're still alive To take their fucking shit They'll take the words right out of your mouth The dark comes in the light goes out And in the darkest days you'll see The light never meant much to me They'll take the words right out of your mouth The dark comes in the light goes out And in the darkest days you'll see The light never meant much to me They'll take the words right out of your mouth The dark comes in the light goes out And in the darkest days you'll see The light never meant much to me Have you seen my cigarettes? I can't seem to find them Always filled with deep regret I close my eyes to hide it And still I can't forget The loophole in blindness Is that you're still alive To take their fucking shit
13.
And they're coming on down the block again And they're coming on down the block again And they're coming on down the block They're coming down the block And you just can't stop them And they're coming on down the block again And they're coming on down the block again And they're coming on down the block They're coming down the block And you just can't stop them And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And they're coming on down the block again And they're coming on down the block again And they're coming on down the block They're coming down the block And you just can't stop them And they're coming on down the block again And they're coming on down the block again And they're coming on down the block They're coming down the block And you just can't stop them And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go And we don't know where to go
14.
I hear you run a tight ship Well throw me right in the brig Did I do something to upset you Was it something I said? I'm going out on top In the middle of my prime yeah Don't stop singing that I'm gonna go out on top You'll know it's time when the music stops playing I'm going out I used to wish good luck, the best to you and yours But I could give a fuck about that any more And then again just like everything in life God damn if you do God damn if you don't I'm going out on top Like a comet burning bright yeah Don't stop singing that I'm gonna go out on top You'll know it's time when the music stops playing I'm going out
15.
iii. 00:28
16.
No Place 03:57
Join me in deep conversation Toy with me the idea of despair A classic lack of observation Is all that's happening there In a city of like-minded people But nobody seems to agree Climb to the top of the highest steeple Ignorance as far as the eye can see No use for a place to call my own No use for a place to call my own Bear through the trials and tribulations There is no reason to be scared This is no standard complication No one ever said it would be fair Release your thoughts and inhibitions They're of no use to you now We all suffer under these conditions We all share The same doubts The same doubts No use for a place to call my own No use for a place to call my own No use for a place to call my own No use for a place to call my own

credits

released March 25, 2021

Jake Dietrich - Bass / Vocals
Zach Karpinski - Guitar / Vocals
Kevin Bohen - Lead Guitar / BG Vocals
Matt Hardin - Drums / FunTime PartyMan

Featuring Sam Torres - Sax on 'Missing Adult'

Recorded by Fine Grain and Mike Hickey
Mixed & Mastered by Mike Hickey at Brunswick Recording, Troy, NY
Cover Art by Fine Grain

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Fine Grain Albany, New York

Fine Grain floats in between shoegaze haze and punk posturing. With prog-inspired riffs, post-punk murk, and the occasional ripping sax solo, fine grain offers up rambunctious reverie fit for hardcore fans of all generations. Fine Grain’s maturation is a testament to the transformative possibility of punk, showing how pulled threads of the past can still stitch together a promising new future. ... more

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